finding joy in january

my word of the year for 2025 and how it's helped me through a challenging month - plus a book club update

convalescing / companions / coffee

I realise this letter is about January but being sent to you half way through February. I realise that everyone has already written about words of the year, and goals, and vision boards, and moved on to other things. I also realise that none of that matters all that much and I don’t necessarily need to explain. But, the thing is, I started this letter in January and then the universe had other ideas, as it so often does. So here we are, in February still thinking about January - feeling both behind schedule and simultaneously right on time, as I so often do.

A few weeks ago I had a frankly terrifying trip to A&E when the left side of my face went numb and stopped moving. Since I have a blood-clotting condition there was a real possibility that I’d had a stroke so it was all a bit more tense than you’d hope for on a Friday night. Thankfully, after many tests, consultations, and a few more tests, I was diagnosed with Bell’s Palsy - a temporary facial palsy with various possible causes. It continued to worsen over a few days and affected my speech, my smile, and my left eye was unable to blink on its own. I looked and sounded like a different person and felt a bit remote, a bit removed from everyone, as a result. I was also one of the unlucky few that experience pain with the condition and it was so severe as it shot through my ear, neck and jaw, that I wasn’t able to sleep until I was prescribed some very strong, very welcome, painkillers.

I’m happy to say that I’ve almost completely recovered and my facial movement has returned with only some sound sensitivity in my affected ear still causing some discomfort at times. Me, my forehead lines, my crow’s feet, and my full grin are all delighted to be reunited and back in the right place. I like that my face moves and I like seeing myself smile - I didn’t appreciate either of those things this way until now. As you can imagine, finding joy in the movement of my face wasn’t something I expected to find but, there it is. I’m glad to be back here, writing to you, as well.

forever sporting chipped nails 💅🏻

january joy

Amidst this month off from life, work, and writing, I’ve been clinging on to my word of the year for 2025. Last year I chose “possible” and the year before that it was “healing” - each one is a reminder of a mindset or a perspective that I’m hoping will help me through the months to come. If you’re interested in the process of choosing and using a word of the year for yourself, I wrote about it last year and shared that post from the archive again recently. You can find it here, if you fancy a read:

from the archive: choosing and using a word of the year

This year, I chose the word “joy”. It’s really a reminder to look for the tiniest moments of goodness, the light making shadows, the sound of my snoring dogs, the smell of my coffee in the morning - all of it. If you’ve read haver & sparrow for a while then you’ll know I’m a big fan of looking for beauty and magic in the everyday so this word might not come as a surprise to you. If anything, it might seem an obvious choice.

But this word isn’t just about photographing corners of my living room (which I’ll still do, of course). This year I want to chase joy in all areas of life, to let that idea help me to be brave about the choices I make, the things I say yes (and no) to, the way I live my life for the next twelve months. I also want to chase joy more than ever because the world at large feels like it’s falling apart and becoming crueler by the day: we need to remember that the good is there and that there’s something worth fighting for.

We need to fill ourselves up so we can keep reading, keep witnessing, keep listening, keep sharing, keep talking, keep writing. So that we can keep going. We need joy.

So, here’s a little gallery, in no particular order and presented without explanation, of things that have brought me joy in January. They’re all from home because that’s where I’ve been - there’s still so much to notice, though, isn’t there?

You might need to tap to see them full size since the gallery settings squish them into squares.

one last thing: a rebel readers book club update

Our next book has been chosen and I was hoping to share it with you in January and then in February but instead I’m going to take it all even slower than I’d like and instead go as slow as I need - a lesson my body teaches me again and again. So, let’s just take it a day at a time for the rest of the month, read the stacks of books we already have, and aim to get back together in March. How does that sound? In the meantime, I’d love to hear what you’ve been reading over the last couple of months - share your favourites in the comments. I’ve flitted between fantasy, non-fiction, and re-reads of old favourites, as per usual, and am currently in the midst of Alias Grace by Margaret Atwood.

If you haven’t heard about the book club before, you can find all the details here:

rebel readers: Cassandra Speaks by Elizabeth Lesser - the intro

Okay, I’ll leave it there for now and get myself another coffee…

I’d love to hear what’s brought you joy in January - tell me in the comments or tag me on Notes. Remember that even the tiniest moment counts! Share them all.

See you in the comments, friends - and all going well, I’ll see you next week too.